When I sit in this room late at night, and it is raining outside, and I'm feeling lost but strangely optimistic, and I turn on the radio, "Hallelujah" as sung by Jeff Buckley will play. It is one of those moments which solidifies this certainty I have -- someone up there is conducting my soundtrack -- someone up there is perhaps conducting everything.

I'm supposed to be writing my resume right now but I've stalled because I loathe compiling all that crap once again. Taking one of many steps I've taken recently in trying to cobble together some new, scary life. I filled out a change of address form today. I liked that old address.

But don't get me wrong. I'm not sad. I've slogged through all of that sentimental bullshit already. I'm just sort of -- in awe.